When I had my first round of chemo I was in shock and upset, and then I got sick and was in the hospital, and was in more shock and more upset. It took me two days of being in the hospital and having to ask for pain meds and my doctor coming in and talking to me for me to realize I needed help to beat this, and asking for help is not something that I am good at, at all!!!
I feel like a failure if I need help. I mean, shouldn't I be able to do things on my own. I know it doesn't sound logical, but that is how I work. I don't like to do things if I can't do them well, and I don't like to do them if I can't do them on my own. I know there are some things that I need help with, sometimes it just takes me a while to realize that.
I realized that starting chemo, going in for IV fluids every other day, letting people bring food, offer to help move, help with our kids, start fundraisers, the list goes on... is not giving up, it's not quitting, it's asking for help, and the bigger part, is ACCEPTING the help.
I got a lot of emails when I started chemo, but there was one that said it so well,
"Let people see you. Not just physically see you, but practically. When someone wants to make you meal, take care of your kids, do something nice, let them. It's good for us all to have opportunities to take our focus off of ourselves once in a while. So see, it's just good for humanity to let someone do a good deed."
I realized that people want to help and that I need to let people help, but not just people. I needed to recognize that I needed help to beat this and getting help is not giving up or quitting. It's fighting and using everything I can and have to win!
You are a beautiful inspiration, Dear Kendra! Thank you for your heartfelt sharing. In your needing of help and explaining so poignantly about it, you are helping us to follow the same path. We all ought to be that way every day. Loving you, Sunnie
ReplyDeleteHey Kendra so glad you are now seeing it as such. I know how hard it is for you right but think of it this way if were another friend of yours going through this would you not be there to help with anything I know damn well you would that is what friend do for each other. "Let It Be" as perfectly stated by Beatles . We are here for you and are fighting with you through you. Let us be your people. So I say let me know what you need or what I can do message me.
ReplyDeleteSorry Kendra comment above is me tried to change the name
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